Enfield lose their rags and much more

The summer rolled on as 27° heat basted the small heads of the pre-teen footballers playing on our pitch. OK, we know it's September, but still, we wanted to start early. But the young Woodside Park Wanderers, some 8-0 up, still had 20 minutes to play in their game and we were worrying about the light already.

Mark attempted an early end to the match by boldly walking on to the football pitch to set out the boundary markers. This embroiled him in a row with a dad on the touchline. When the mum joined in it was time to call a halt to the wind up and wait patiently for our fellow tenants to finish their game.

The light fades fast at this time of year as we approach the Autumn Equinox. This is the dilemma of Indian summer cricket. As the clock crept towards two we had managed to clear the field and, being asked to field, stood around for 10 minutes while Enfield slowly put their kit on.

Your correspondent opened the bowling on a concrete pudding of a pitch. Odd bare patches of London clay offered some bounce with effort and things looked lively, yet often slow. Dave Cattell took the first scalp with only five on the board, left hander Cole misreading a quick one.

The second of their lefties, Demant, approached the crease and played with his usual dull caution, looking to nick things through the slips.

This guy has always been a pain in the butt to me so, in the fourth over or so, with the score on 10, I tried take his head off. A tennis ball like bouncer lurched towards his throat. He put his gloves up and dutifully fended it off to the lightning slow Ferdenzi at first slip who took a fine falling catch. Or so we thought.

I was amazed to see Demant stand his ground, scowl at me, then call his own umpire a "dozy c**t!" According to Mr D, it "hit me arm guard". Maybe it did, but don't look at us mate, we didn't raise the finger. Ten for two.

Enter the dangerous left-hander Frank Sawyer, who dispatched the last two balls of my spell for 10. Cattell received a few lusty blows, but Sawyer didn't bank on Sundown Specials fielding diva Jani at mid off. Frank attempted his usual smash down the ground and Jani ran in and dived bravely forwards to snaffle a rocket of a catch inches off the ground - one of the finest takes this season.

Aussie Dave Sambrook came down the hill, to keep things tight, and Ringo up the hill, to give some runs away.

Nonetheless, Ringo has the knack of taking wickets when the batsmen least expect it. H Good, rocking away on 27, fell to the classic Tailor three-card-trick. Full toss for four, rank long hop for four, unplayable outswinging medium pace yorker - bowled.

His second wicket came from a short one on leg stump that was so slow the batsman, Glynn - who was looking well set - could have played his shot three times. The result, a dolly to me at square leg.

The game then became very dull - bar one incident. From 107 for 5, Mehta and the giant Ward put on 75, somewhat controversial, runs. Demant had exhausted his hissy fit and was umpiring at the Bathard end. Tony Medlock was mixing it up at this end by then, and with Ward on about 10, clean bowled him on the full, the ball ricocheting off Mick McGowan's pads and back down the pitch.

Ward stood his ground. Tony had to suffer the indignity of appealing to the umpire. Demant claimed to be unsure if it didn't hit the stumps from Mick's pads. The square leg umpire, Sawyer, decided that he didn't know either and called it "One-all". I got confused at this point ... what was he trying to say? Not a reference to their own player giving Demant out earlier? Surely "one-all" was a tacit acknowledgement that Ward was out.

Anyway, I'm pleased to report that Specials resumed the game without punching anyone. But that's probably only because Dave Reed has retired. Oh, and guess what, Ward (who, judging by his part in the controversy, is deaf, dumb and blind) finished 45 not out, as complete apathy set in and they reached a reasonable 184.

With light certain to fade on us quickly, we knew we only had 30 or so overs in which we could see the ball...

Vernon and Medlock opened the innings. Medders was chasing 700 runs, starting on 650. A previous best for a season was the legendary Dave Reed's 692 in 1992.

Skipper Silva started down the hill and tried to exploit the somewhat uneven bounce, with mixed success. Tony survived an easy chance on four - the hapless Demant slow to grab the chance at silly point. Invicta crowded the bat and Vernon soon fell with the score on 16.

Jani arrived and smacked a couple of fours off the unlucky Silva, and Tony joined in the rout taking 13 off one of Silva's overs.

Jani left a straight one and departed on 11, LBW. Although he felt aggrieved, it could have been given out from Tally Ho corner.

With Mick McGowan at the crease as well, Tony moved serenely onto 40, before the keeper took one off his bat that had popped up the ridge. Taking it low and with our umpire looking the other way, Tony asked the keeper if it was up and promptly walked. This was his last game of the season and fell 10 short of a remarkable milestone.

Mark stepped up to the plate to join McGowan. Mick was also in the hunt for batting milestones, starting the day on 632 runs. By this time we had 99, needing 86 for victory from the last 15 overs.

Mark played his most sensible innings for a decade, lasting seven overs or so for 11, taking the score to 137, with Mick compiling the runs at the other end - a mixture of exquisite fours and scampered singles. Jan Krypner belted a crazy three before being run out - courtesy of one of McGowan's quick singles...

With the tail looming and Mick homing in on a batting record, Dave Sambrook entered the fray in the fading light. Silva brought himself back on to bowl quickly in the dark, but to no avail. Mick dissed him over square leg for a four, Dave smacked a couple into the fence and we had won with two overs to spare. Mick finished on 89 not out, one of his finest chases for Specials, taking him past 700 runs for the season. A good result, an action packed game, and one which could easily have descended into chaos.

Winners
Mick McGowan, fine innings

Cricket, despite the controversy everyone got on with the game and had a drink in the bar...

Losers
Demant. It's only a game. But looking back... I thought you were out.

Stay tuned to see if Specials can gain revenge over Pymmes in the last match of the season...

© Dominic Pilgrim 2003